Learning to be Humble

 

 

“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he. “Eat and drink!” he says to you, But his heart is not with you.” Proverbs‬ ‭23‬:‭7‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

“Do not eat the food of a begrudging host, do not crave his delicacies; for he is the kind of person who is always thinking about the cost. “Eat and drink,” he says to you, but his heart is not with you.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭23‬:‭6‬-‭7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“Do not eat the bread of a man who is stingy; do not desire his delicacies, for he is like one who is inwardly calculating. “Eat and drink!” he says to you, but his heart is not with you. You will vomit up the morsels that you have eaten, and waste your pleasant words.”Proverbs‬ ‭23‬:‭6‬-‭8‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I believe I’ve been interpreting this verse incorrectly. If I only consider it from the NKJV and focus solely on the first part, “for as he thinks in his heart so is he,” I believe it’s about self-perception. The way we view ourselves determines our reality.

However, when I read it in different versions and examine the verses preceding and following verse seven, I gain a different perspective and a deeper understanding of the proverb’s meaning.

This verse appears to be speaking about a stingy or miserly person who calculates the cost of my food. He doesn’t care about me or what I’m sharing; he’s only concerned with what I’m costing him. My words or compliments will be wasted on him.

Perhaps this is what Jesus meant when He said, “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.” Matthew 7:6 ESV

Thinking too highly of ourselves or believing we’re better than others can lead to pride and selfish thinking, similar to the person in this proverb.

Paul cautions us in Romans 12:3, “…not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.”

Proverbs 11:2, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom,” and 15:33, “The fear of the Lord is instruction in wisdom, and humility comes before honor,” reinforce what Paul is warning against in Romans 12:3.

Paul also reminds us in Philippians 2:3 (ESV), “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.”

Humility is actually “having a modest, accurate view of one’s own importance, achievements, and limitations.”

So, how do we humbly consider others more significant than ourselves? 

Is it about prioritizing their needs over our own? Is it about being willing to have our plans disrupted? Perhaps it’s about spending time with someone who isn’t the easiest to get along with. Or is it about giving of ourselves to someone in some small way without expecting anything in return? Even a willingness to serve and not be served, just like Jesus, who also taught us, “Whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them…” (see Matthew 7:12 ESV)

I appreciate Peter’s reminder in 1Peter 5:5(ESV), which encourages us to “clothe ourselves with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’”

For me, learning to be humble sounds a lot like dying to self. Sometimes, I can be too self-focused, thinking only about me and my desires. However, in reality, it’s about others and how I can meet their needs and make a difference in their lives. Ultimately, it should be about the Lord and what brings Him glory.

Thankfully, His mercies are new each morning, and His grace is abundant!